Sea of Monsters

All aboard, the ship is almost ready to depart! Those are some of the most exciting words anyone can hear when they have lived to long in one place. Every one has bright eyes and a little extra peep in their step. You can see we are all ready to move on. I am ready to move on, I don’t really know where but some where far from here. It’s ok if I have to stay in a dark ship with crowded courters for a short time. There is a whole new world out there. Excuse me sir, I need to put my bag up on that shelf behind you. He looked confused for a moment. Something most of clicked because his eyes lit up and he moved out of my way. We are going to travel together and yet it is so hard for me to talk to strangers. We stood there for a few minutes just staring at each other. The longer it takes to say anything the weirder this is going to be.

Umm… So where are you going?

What? Oh, yeah. He rubbed the back of his head, while sweat dripped down his forehead. I don’t rightly know. It must be crazy to take a big leap traveling alone when you don’t know where you are going.

I guess not crazy enough because that is what I am doing. I mean if we have come to the same conclusion it can’t be to far off. Can it?

A smirk crossed his face. What’s your name young man? We shuck hands, Andrew sir. Nice to meet you young man, I am George. A loud thud came from down the hall. Followed by a man screaming and more banging around. It sounded like a man was being tossed around like a rag doll. People began to run to the sound. I didn’t really know why I was following the crowed, I wouldn’t be able to help with whatever this was. The crowd stopped; making a barricade for any short person like me. Screams echoed through the hall. While gasps seemed to capture whatever was left in the air. Someone forgot to stop and ran into me. I reached for someone’s arm and missed. The black floor drew close before greeting me with the shame filled sting of hitting the ground. As I lifted my head I saw red, Oh my gosh I bleeding.

Then I saw the man, sprawled across the ground. It was not my blood, I scrambled to my feet. I couldn’t catch my breath. I really didn’t want to either since it smelled like death. People rushed to his assistance, thankfully covering up my vision of the man. I slipped down a corridor, thinking to myself how did this happen? Who did this to him, or maybe it is better to say what did this to him. Whimpering came from down the hall along with someone sounding hysterical. I felt like a moth to a flame, my feet kept moving. My mind was trying to tell me this is how people die in horror movies.

Still I pushed the door open and walked into the room. A girl held onto a monster hanging out the hole on the side of the ship. It was scratching her arm, not seeming to want to be rescued. It was more intent in harming this small woman who was crying out in pain. I won’t let you go, let me help you! Snot was running down her face almost thicker then her tears. The creature ran one of her talons into the woman’s side. She Screamed and pulled back for a second. She reached again to help the monster, receiving more scratches as a thank you for her help.

Stop, let it fall! it is going to bring you down with her. She looked at me trembling. Please help me, she was my sister. We use to be so close to each other, I can’t let her go.

You have to let her go, because you can’t bring the past with you into the future. If she was to follow you into your next season she would have followed. That isn’t your sister, It’s your past trying to drown you.

No, I can’t, I can’t. I can’t let go, she is apart of me. We use to conquer the world together if she leaves then who will go with me? Her body began to sink under the weight of holding on. Her voice cracked, I can’t keep doing this alone.

I dared to touch her shoulder and sat beside her. You have been doing this alone for a long time haven’t you? She flinched at that question, then answered. I almost couldn’t hear her yes, but it was there. Bringing her along will not change that feeling of being alone. She will only drag you backwards when you are trying to go forwards. I watched a slow tear run down her face and I caught it with my finger. My eyes got lost in the storm in her eyes. There is a time to fight for others and then there are times when you have to let them go. You don’t have to do this alone, I will help you. Your just going to have to let the past go.

She looked at the monster in silence, sitting still and calm. Then she let go, the monster still trying to harm her. Until it was lost in dark blue sea, hopefully to never return. She leaned into me, I could feel her body shake as she tried to catch her breath. I Held her for a moment, it’s going to be okay. My name is Andrew, what is your name? I could hear it in her warm breath, smell it in the salt of her tears. Nice to meet you Liz; listen to me this is important did you bring anymore of your past?

It’s in the trunk over there. She pointed to trunk that was bouncing around. The creatures scratching and banging around in the big piece of oak. I walked over and shoved it to the edge. I hate to ask this from you, but you need to be the one to shove it out to sea. Her eyes pleaded with me, please don’t make me do this. Her steps where shaky, understandable after seeing how her past was treating her. On three, one, two, three, and it fell.

Of course all I could think to say now was “So where are you heading to?”. Liz let out a small laugh, I don’t know. I only knew it was time to go. Well Liz, I guess we can figure that out together.

-R. D. Jess

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Hi, I am R.D. Jess. I am a christian writer and postpartum doula. My relationship with my God is not a religion but a state of who I am. I love being there for others and find that writing the hard truth is the best way to make people feel less alone.

2 thoughts on “Sea of Monsters

  1. I’m so proud of you! Letting go doesn’t stop the love but it does allow us to go forward and to heal. And don’t forget the power of prayer. Great expression of letting go. I like Andrew too!

    Liked by 1 person

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